My circle of friends is broken. I live alone. My finances are dependent on my unskilled labor as a middle-aged man with injuries. My creative endeavors languish in obscurity.
Optimism is wishful thinking. There are no signs of things getting better.
I am blamed for my troubles. I am told I should do this or could have done that, blah, blah, blah. Never mind that I never rob or exploit. I work for my living. I work hard. I literally broke my back acting above and beyond for the very capitalists who fired me for it.
Humanity is a prolific species of lonely creatures. My friends drift away, sooner or later, and usually with little or no warning. I am loved when convenient and disliked at a whim. I am told this is not a problem since it happens with everyone. It is especially a problem because it happens with everyone!
I take care of myself as best I can. I am thrifty and mind my health.
I never sacrifice other people. On the contrary: I am mindful to never gain at their expense. My good deeds are secrets.
I would be blessed to reap what I sow. I am instead
cursed by the endless grind of a world going nowhere. I am crushed by the
grinding.
We do not live in a Godless world. We live for Him, not for ourselves. All this will pass in the blink of an eye. We should not treat religion as way of reaping rewards for ourselves. It is about submission to He who is greater than us. The hardest thing you can ever do is let go, and most people in the world will never do that. It's just too hard.
ReplyDeleteI wonder if I offended God. People dislike me, and they are of him. Though they say "I hate people" and I never do, I am considered antisocial.
DeleteYou have done what you can do. It remains to be seen what will come of it. Still, miracles are real as we both know.
ReplyDeleteYes, they are... and usually in the darkest hour.
Delete